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Be Inspired by Your Teen:
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The teenage years are traditionally a struggle for everyone; parents, teachers, coaches, and the teenagers themselves, who are navigating enormous physical, emotional and social changes that leave them confused, unsettled and withdrawn. Everyone is looking for answers about how best to navigate these choppy waters when teens are bouncing between child and adult thinking and experiencing the teen drama of raging hormones and emerging adulthood. Dozens of theories and strategies abound to make this transition easier, as witnessed by the wide ranging clutter of teen parenting books available at your favorite book store. But many of these self help book focus on problems and negativity, and the books are steeped in advice about what to avoid, troubling signs to look out for, or checklists for behaviors that discourage with punishments or promote with bribes. There is a refreshing, original alternative to the problem laden teenage books and any parent, teacher or mentor interested in changing the way they look at the teens in their lives, should check out Grace Lanni's, "Be Inspired By Your Teen: New Tools for You to Better Connect with Your Teenager Today". This book will help you rethink the relationship you have with your teenagers and give you new insight about how to relate differently, not only to improve effective communication, but to be inspired as well. It sounds too good to be true, but it's not. Grace is a widow raising two teens by herself and she, like many other concerned and confused parents, read more than her share of the "expert" parenting books, only to find that none of them spoke to her and that special relationship and level of communication she wanted to experience with her children. Her response was to write her own book, and inspired by her lived experience and the thought provoking writings of Joe Vitale and Dr Hew Len Ihalealala, authors of Zero Limits, she describes a unique perspective about inspiration and a new connectedness strategy, Get Connected, that can be used by parents, teachers and teens alike. The basis of her inspiration perspective is that real communication comes from "the sum of a million little moments that you get to have with you teens" and her goal is to empower them to be the best they can be, personally, academically, emotionally and spiritually. One key need is to establish an ongoing dialog so they will feel connected and share communication, so you are talking to each other, not at each other. Another important element of the process of unlocking inspiration is connectedness, so that you have a deeper, real understanding of your teen as they have for you, and you develop a sense of where you feel your understanding of their world is. Her recommendations include: thinking about what you like about your teen, his loving nature, a favorite time you spent together, his humor, her compassion; creating a family event time line; completing and sharing the Connected Survey; and making notes from observations, ideas, and thoughts generated around your teenager. Many parents are stunned to learn what they don't know about their teens', and equally surprising, many teens know little about their parents, in terms of concerns, passions, close friends and even work and daily schedule. In sum, Grace believes that children are gifted to us for inspiration, that you are a mirror for your children as they are a mirror for you, and that inspiration lies in discovering your child's beauty and that which can be cleared to uncover more beauty for you and your child. Grace emphasizes the unique and important role of a parent and how it is differs from that of a friend, with clear boundary setting, especially if there are problem behaviors. The book is divided into 8 chapters and structured like a play book with coaching metaphors that educate and encourage, and provide the thread of the connectedness process with practical strategies and note taking pages at the end of each section. Notes are key to the process so it's important to make use of this valuable space to put her techniques into action. She makes the point that immediate action is not necessary for every thought,observation or idea, but making notes helps reference them later on when you are actively unlocking inspiration. A particularly meaningful coaching analogy is the necessary preparations to play on a team. You need to "Dress Out" which means wearing the uniform, having the right equipment, getting into the game mindset, understanding the rules for your position, and also those of the other players. Grace describes getting "Dressed Out" for parenting your teen by learning about and understanding their lives:school, friends, sports, social networking sites, music, and academic pressures. One important element is accessing your own teenage memories that help you make relevant comparisons, connect with parts of yourself, and most importantly, help release parental memories that show up as problems. Teens today face many similar issues as their parent's generation, but there are huge differences that make the modern teenage experience so much more challenging and complex; social networking is but one major difference that creates new pressures and anxiety. The practical application of Grace's Get Connected process is clearly illustrated in several real life case studies that describe and explain the process step by step, for many typical teenage issues. Utilizing the guiding principles of Zero Limits including: you don't have control over everything, you can heal whatever comes your way, and you are 100% responsible for all you experience, Grace defines the steps as:
Grace's most profound message is that "Until you are connected and communicating with love and compassion it's impossible to have an inspired parent/teen relationship". To learn more about this unique and original book, and how to effectively use the Get Connected process, join Emily Bouchard on February 26th at 6pm PST / 9pm EST when she will interview author Grace Lanni as part of the www.blended-families.com Ask the Expert series. |
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145 Tyee Dr. #1526 · Point Roberts, WA 98281
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·145 Tyee Dr. #1526 · Point Roberts, WA 98281
Expertly created and promoted by Website Promotion Experts, Inc.
Graphic design by Illusive Design - Contact Us Sales Policy Affiliates